Turning point…

I’ve always been a realist. I’ve never believed in love at first sight. I’ve always believed that love is built through learning, understanding, and trust. In other words “patience” is the fundamentals to find love. It turns out, I was so worried about forcing and accepting less than what I deserved, that I could have possibly missed what fate had in store for me.

I look back now on where I went wrong. I’ve always been an enabler. I’ve accepted and settled for relationships that I thought I could caudal. I’ve given my all (or so I thought) to better my partner, while in the process, losing myself in the process. I’ve cried tears of loss, which feel more like failure now. I’ve spent the better half of my life bettering others, accepting less, and I don’t regret it… it led me to you.

It all rings so cliche’ in my mind, “When you least expect it”, “You will know”, “It was love at first sight”… all of these phrases run through my head. All phrases I believed were created by Hallmark and punch lust fools who were lost in translation. Until I met you.

Whatever it was… Fate, God, karma… I will never know. I have more gratitude for this “being” than I could ever show. They brought me to you… not in an ordinary way. Not in a way that could ever be described by meaningless words, but by a deeper, meeting of souls, lost on this earth, searching for each other in the dark, kind of way. As if we have loved and lost each other for centuries, yet here we are.

A chance meeting of two souls exhausted, not searching, just barely surviving. That’s where we met. On a rooftop in the middle of nowhere really. Same paths, different continents, matching stories. We knew the moment we locked eyes. We were home.

There are many articles written about “Love”. How to find it, how to force it, and how to keep it. None will ever apply to your soulmate. It isn’t something you can create, or force. It just IS. This person will make you realize in an instant that your life has just begun, everything prior to was leading up to this. The point where you can finally breathe, the beginning of your happily ever after. This person will literally be the puzzle piece your heart has searched for, for your entire life. This person will awaken stories ages old, feelings of decades lost, and a completeness that could only be described as “Unbelievable”.

Unbelievable because I had not been a believer. I had scoffed at others, envied them Yes, but looked down on them nonetheless. Secretly hoping for their downfall. It had almost tripped me up completely until I decided to join a stranger from out of town for a drink one night. No words could possibly describe what came next. It led me to you.

The man that sat before me as I opened the rooftop door was not known physically to me prior to, but he was upon first sight. His smile lit me up as though a fire had been lit in my soul. As we talked for hours into the night, it became blatantly clear, this was not some random chance meeting, but a final destination of sorts. I have heard the saying “I love you more today, than I did yesterday”, but I can honestly say this man has loved me, as I have him, for many more years than “yesterday”. You found me.

It’s foreign to me, I’ve never been a believer. It’s amazing, incredible, and frightening at the same time. The miles between us being the only hurdle. One we are both working tirelessly to accomplish. Because, “when you know… you just know”. Which is why I will fight for us until my last breath.

That brings me to my point. If someone is fighting for a relationship where they are the only one fighting, you need to walk away. Don’t settle. Your person is out there. If you are questioning their feelings, they aren’t the one. Be kind to everyone, you never know if your person was the person you ran into while talking to the wrong one. I can, without a doubt, tell you they are searching for you as well…. a non believer, to another, don’t sell yourself short. It’s real, there is a happily ever after. The fairytale exists. You just have to be open to see them.

To my soulmate, thank you for finding me in the middle of crazy! You have awoken my spirit in a way I haven’t felt in this life. You are anything and everything I’ve never prayed for. We will make it right this time and get our happily ever after ❤️… plus one ❤️

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